poly_crack | (no subject)

BUCKLE UP: A TEST DRIVE MEME

Been feeling as if you'd sort of, kind of, maybe like to consider a new character at Poly? Haven't had the chance to figure out whether they work for you in the setting or in general?

Just start a thread for them here with:

character name | series

- in the title, and tag around! Alternatively, just comment to someone else's thread, either doing your own thing, assuming characters just met in the City, or maybe working off one of the following premises:

i. ...it's raining people! The character whom you're tagging missed the memo about perfect Fountain landings and ended up falling on your character instead.

OR

ii. ...ah, a lovely evening at a City shop or bar, when you've just realized you don't have the currency to pay your tab and you have to beg or steal it off someone else!

OR

iii. ...your characters are running up an endlessly high hill from a herd of rabid pandas.

Naturally, the meme is more than open to people who aren't currently at Poly, so pimp this to poor souls you're hoping to enable, it's the perfect time to lure'im in ♥

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

No, of course not. You never fight. Mostly because that would involve actually talking to me. Kind of goes against that whole "tool" look you're going for.

[You will notice he's not trying to attack you! ...Yet. Hey, he's grown. Ish. ...He's also eaten recently, which helps.]

Look, I'm sorry about that, okay? I was a douchebag. I was the fucking king of the douchebags.

[As he sets his backpack down, there's... rattling? It almost sounds like Charley's packing stakes.]

[Snidely.] Oh, you think? Just maybe?

It's a little late for apologies after you let him turn me. Seriously? That's what convinced you. Well gee, that's helpful.

[And then he pulls a face.]

You serious with that? What, you carry stakes now? You're a professional?

[Sorry, Chuckles, he hasn't had the chance to ream you for the Jerry thing yet when he comes from, you'll have to hear it again.]

What do you expect me to do? Go back in time?

[Salt in the wound, Evil. Keep rubbing it in. It's not like Charley feels bad about ignoring his ex-best friend and letting him get turned into a vampire and then killing him.]

Yeah, I'm a professional. I killed Jerry.

...Bullshit.

[This face? Combination of pissed, worried, and glad. He couldn't tell you which one's winning.]

No, seriously. And the part that sucks? Peter Vincent has this magic stake that offed Jerry and made his vampire minions human again and everyone lived happily ever fucking after except for you and Doris.

Yeah, well. Doris was a stripper, she never had a chance anyway; it's the rules. But I didn't get a pass? How does that work? --And I'm not a minion, by the way.

[He frowns.]

Dude, I thought he was making that shit up. He's a hack, I found that out like...the first ten minutes after I met him here.

Doris was a go-go dancer and no, I staked you before I got to Jerry.

What'd he tell you?

Hang on, hang on.

You what?!

[You may have all the teeth and bulging veins, Brewster. JACKASS.]

[Diving for the stakes now, thanks.]

I had to, Ed! You killed Peter's chick and then you and Jerry were after me and Amy. I didn't want to, man; I cried over your ashes and all that shit.

[Um, no. No you're not, because Ed is most definitely trying to get them away from you, if he has to physically throw you somewhere else or restrain you by force. He doesn't really care which, he is NOT getting staked, thank you.]

Oh, because that makes it all better.

[...okay, it kind of does. A little. But he's not admitting that.]

Do you have any idea how much that shit hurts?

[Ed doesn't, not really. But he's got an idea; Jerry did get staked once before Ed got here, after all, even if it wasn't particularly effective -- he got the echo if it, at least.]

But I'm still trying to figure out how the hell you got Jerry. I mean, he's... [JERRY.]

[Since Ed has that crazy vampire speed-strength combo, let's go for throwing. It's not like Charley hasn't been tossed around before.

He sits up, but otherwise stays where Ed chucks him. Frankly, Evil, he really doesn't want to stake you again, and he's hoping there's still some human-Ed kicking around inside vampire-Ed.]

Dude, I didn't want to. Amy practically had to do it herself, I was so freaked. [And fuck you, Ed, because Charley is so not over being responsible for both of your deaths and if he cries he'll have to stake you just so there won't be witnesses.]

He's Jerry, yeah, I know. Super-bad, super-evil Jerry. [pause while he wonders whether or not he should share this] I set him on fire.

Oh, thanks buddy, that really helps, that your skank girlfriend made you do it.

[There is. A teeny tiny amount, but it's there, and you mostly have the other Charlie to thank for him even bothering to let it stick around, Brewster.

It's why he stays where he is, sneering because he's still pissed, but letting him have his space.]

That doesn't kill. You know that, right? Hurts like a motherfucker, but that's about it.

She's not a skank. [Clever, Brewster. Argue with the vampire. He abandons this plan.] But seriously, you were going to kill us.

[Thanks for the space. Charley will remain where he is. Standing up could be interpreted as "I'm going to grab a stake and kill you," which would lead to dying, which is not the plan.]

I know, but it kept him distracted. I hooked myself to him him, Peter shot up the ceiling and let in some sun, and I staked him.

Yes. She is. And just because you don't want her to be doesn't make her not, and if you're going to shove me again because you don't like hearing it, fucking go for it. And of course I was going to kill you. Because you were in the way.

[He didn't quite get that it would have been the reason until he says it, but the minute he does he knows it's right; even now he doesn't hate him enough to actually want him gone, he just wants him to hurt, that's all. Mark, he wants dead. Charley, not so much.]

Huh. Guess that works. But whatever you did, he's here now.

Just leave Amy out of it. [Shoving an angry vampire is a Bad Idea, even when that vampire is Ed.] In the way of what?

And yeah, I noticed. Jerry sucks at being dead.

His goal. Come on, Brewster. Think.

Either that or he's really excellent at it.

[It's a joke. Sort of.]

His goal to what, take over the world with a vampire army? And I'm a huge obstacle to that?

[Well. He kind of was. And Ed, that was awful.]

You know what I mean, man.

(no subject)

PREPARE TO BE....SNARKED AT. BECAUSE YOU BROKE HIS HEART. ...only not.

Sorry about the messy breakup, dude.

...I'm sure he'll get over it? eventually.

Before or after the killing?

ehhh it's a toss-up, really.

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